At Home In The Cloudz Journal Blog

scared

my emotions are getting worse. my depression and anxiety have been really good for a while and over the past few days it feels like they are getting worse. I’m clearly in a depressive episode. but I’m really scared. I feel like all of my positive emotions have shut down. I feel more negative feeling then positive throughout the day. My anxiety feels worse, I’m scared that I don’t love anyone that I care about, but I know I do I just cant feel it. I keep getting these waves of anxiety. They are so awful! I hate this. I’m scared and I don’ know whats going on!

Panic attack

I had a really bad panic attack last night. I starting thinking about some stuff and it sent me into a full blown attack. It scared the shit out of Tyler. I felt really bad for upsetting him but he understood. I really thought I was going to pass out. Then my hand went numb and that made me panic more because that doesn’t usually happen to me. The worst part is how weird my whole body feels afterwards. I can’t ever really describe it, it just feels off. But once I had finally calmed down enough I just got into bed and went to sleep, thank god. But today I have a headache and I’m feeling a little miserable. Hopeful tomorrow I’ll feel better.

thefaultinourheadcanons:

emeralddarkness:

ughjohnwatson:

do you ever get in those moods where you don’t feel like reading and you don’t feel like being on the internet and you don’t feel like watching a show and you don’t feel like sleeping and you don’t feel like existing in general

BUT YOU WANT TO DO SOMETHING.

It’s in words

(Source: inactive-ughjohnwatson, via fayemilly)

friskygrandma:

I!!!DONT!!!WANNA!!!CARE!!!ABOUT!!!MY!!!WEIGHT!!! BUT!!!I!!!DO!!!

(via danmakesphilhowell)

Found this on Pinterest. I really love it.

Found this on Pinterest. I really love it.

Found this on Pinterest. I really love it.

Found this on Pinterest. I really love it.

“Anxiety is not rude. Depression is not selfish. Schizophrenia is not wrong. Eating disorders are not a choice. Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder is not crazy. Mental illness isn’t self-centred, anymore than cancer is self-centred. It’s a medical illness.”
— (via bewilderedapprehension)

(via im-a-sinner-who-loves-colours)

sweatandhappiness:

I actually really needed to read this right now.

sweatandhappiness:

I actually really needed to read this right now.

(Source: onherway, via lacigreen)

king-0f-pain:

tylerselfieface:

callieolliegail:

This is very important.

To all my followers who self harm. Do this, for me please.
It can save you physical pain.

It relieves me so much that this doesn’t say “if you’re a cutter”

king-0f-pain:

tylerselfieface:

callieolliegail:

This is very important.

To all my followers who self harm. Do this, for me please.

It can save you physical pain.

It relieves me so much that this doesn’t say “if you’re a cutter”

(Source: -trillium-, via danmakesphilhowell)

loveisfluid:

boundunbound:

clauderabbit:

myawfulpersonality:

Having an anxiety disorder is like that moment where your chair almost tips or you miss a step going down the stairs but it never stops

Shit

Truth

THIS IS THE ONLY DESCRIPTION OF ANXIETY I HAVE EVER IDENTIFIED WITH

THIS IS WHAT IT FEELS LIKE

BUT HOURS- SOMETIMES DAYS- LONG

(via baraboobies)

i-will-wait-for-you-endlessly:

i-will-wait-for-you-endlessly:

This girl, named Hannah Batty, has been reported missing and was last seen at Warped Tour in Toronto. 
Please take a second of your time to reblog this post and help us find this girl.
Batty is described as white, 5’5”, 115 lbs., with brown eyes and long, dyed blue hair. She was wearing a black tank top, blue denim cut-off shorts and black Vans sneakers. She has stretchers in her earlobes.
"Concert-goers, promoters, crew, vendors and bands from Toronto’s Vans Warped Tour stop July 4 are being asked to come forward if they remember seeing someone fitting the description of Hannah Batty, or to check their cell phones for inadvertently snapped photos or videos that she happens to be in. The 15-year-old, with long dyed blue hair and wearing a Ghost Town shirt — one of the acts on the bill — was last seen at the lakefront concert at The Flats at Molson Amphitheatre on the Ontario Place grounds at approximately 8 p.m.”  (full article here)
___________________________________________________________________
Anyone with information is asked to contact police at 416-808-2200, Crime Stoppers anonymously at 416-222-TIPS (8477), online at www.222tips.com, text TOR and your message to CRIMES (274637), or Leave A Tip on Facebook. Download the free Crime Stoppers Mobile App on iTunes, Google Play or Blackberry App World.

Keep reblogging, guys. We need to reach as many people as we can. The 2 seconds you take to reblog this post could mean a literal lifetime to Hannah.

i-will-wait-for-you-endlessly:

i-will-wait-for-you-endlessly:

This girl, named Hannah Batty, has been reported missing and was last seen at Warped Tour in Toronto.

Please take a second of your time to reblog this post and help us find this girl.

Batty is described as white, 5’5”, 115 lbs., with brown eyes and long, dyed blue hair. She was wearing a black tank top, blue denim cut-off shorts and black Vans sneakers. She has stretchers in her earlobes.

"Concert-goers, promoters, crew, vendors and bands from Toronto’s Vans Warped Tour stop July 4 are being asked to come forward if they remember seeing someone fitting the description of Hannah Batty, or to check their cell phones for inadvertently snapped photos or videos that she happens to be in. The 15-year-old, with long dyed blue hair and wearing a Ghost Town shirt — one of the acts on the bill — was last seen at the lakefront concert at The Flats at Molson Amphitheatre on the Ontario Place grounds at approximately 8 p.m.”  (full article here)

___________________________________________________________________

Anyone with information is asked to contact police at 416-808-2200, Crime Stoppers anonymously at 416-222-TIPS (8477), online at www.222tips.com, text TOR and your message to CRIMES (274637), or Leave A Tip on Facebook. Download the free Crime Stoppers Mobile App on iTunes, Google Play or Blackberry App World.

Keep reblogging, guys. We need to reach as many people as we can. The 2 seconds you take to reblog this post could mean a literal lifetime to Hannah.

(via restoreforce)

thetomska:

Yeah I’ve been an asshole in the past but I’m pretty fucking cool now and getting better every day. Fuck the past and fuck anyone who tries to keep me there; get a better hobby.

(Source: )

invhale:

Sometimes those who don’t socialize much aren’t actually anti-social, they just have no tolerance for drama and fake people.

(via gaskarth-barakat)

teenjalex:

I really hate being an introvert because I sometimes think “oh hey, I can totally hang out with a bunch of people right now! I can handle it! I hate being alone!!” and then three hours into hanging out I realize how draining of energy it is for me to be around other people and I just want to curl up into a ball and isolate myself for the rest of my life.

(via teenbarakat)